Thoughts of the Past

I do a lot of thinking while driving. I even pray while sitting at stop lights. This time of year I spend more time driving and going to help my loved ones get "up and running" for Christmas. As I was driving to someone's home the other day I happened to think of the first time I ever set up a tree by myself. I was only 12 years old and my family had just suffered the loss of my little brother Curt. He died on my birthday in November of 1964. I can still remember how horribly sad we all were for the holidays that year. Nana and Papa were in such mourning and I so wanted to be able to help them. Not much I could do. As Christmas approched I could see they were in no frame of mind to decorate the house, so I decided I could do it. We had a very fashionable tree as trends go. I got it out and proceeded to set it up. It was about 7 feet tall and was all silver aluminum. It was put together branch by branch into a center trunk that had holes drilled at angle. The branches were numbered as to size as they went up the tree to the top. It stood in a stand and there was a little color wheel we set up to change it's color. Nana had purchased all turquoise blubs that were the elongated pointed kind and I thought they were so beautiful. There were no lights to put on it because when it was all set up and the color wheel was on it went from green to red to blue. I wish I had a picture of it. I don't remember much else about that Christmas, except that I think that was year we got our first Schnauzer we named Tina. She was such a good dog.

I guess that's why I love putting up trees so much. I hope it helped Nana and Papa that year when their thoughts and feelings were so raw. Tracy was only about 7 and I wanted to help make things more normal for her. I know it helped me to be able to do that for our family. I like to think that it helps bring a spirit of peace into our homes and I love to sit and just look at mine every night. It is also a great way to set the mood to remember Christmases past. I would usually help Nana and Papa put up their tree the years I lived close and could. As the tree was done, the garlands up and the cupboards wrapped we would sit on her big green couch and just enjoy the mood of the room. I am glad I have this precious memory, even when I griped on some of the busier years that I had so many trees to do. I regret I didn't get her new tree decorated her last year with us. You just never know when things are the last do you?

Christmas is still so different without her. I will cherish all the memories of all the Christmases...happy, and sad.